I'll have Apricot believe you're gods gift to man before you arrive, and I'll be your wingman as you chat her up.
What happens next is up to you, ma chèrie.

Such a distant reference we have here. Then continue the insane talk.

And you arrive in a universe where the rules of time-space don't apply anymore

Sudden realization, we must write the ending of the barbecue story, as it applies to you.
I prophesise.
Upon the roof, my seat i shall take/ to look upon the sky/ till I smell the smell most sweet, the smell of lovely Milfies cake.

Unexpected topic rule: you must rhyme where possible

Assume ZRNT doesn't exist/ otherwise Kazuya will get real pissed/ at you for hitting on his girl/ he'll get so mad it'll make hurl

Sounds fair

not quite, ma chérie, not quite.

again, not quite mon ami, Cthulhu's madness causing comes from his appearance.

Actually, Cthulhu is High Priest to the gods of madness(and other such things) so technically he isn't the embodiment (your strength is fading odd man)

What?????

He was banned in HF, wasn't he? He'll need a decent equipment unless if he wants to wait.